Joy: what is it and why do we need it?
What is it?
Joy - or happiness - isn't one single thing, it's the balance of three ingredients known as the "macronutrients of happiness": enjoyment, satisfaction and purpose.
Enjoyment is the immediate pleasure we get from engaging in activities which we like - your morning coffee, a laugh with friends, a slice of cake.
Satisfaction is the fulfillment that comes from striving, progress and earned success - the accomplishment after finishing a hard project or crossing a finish line.
Purpose is the sense that your life has meaning and that you're moving in a direction that matters.
Most ambitious, driven people have enjoyment and satisfaction fairly well covered. They know how to treat themselves, and they know how to work hard and feel the payoff. It's purpose that tends to be missing.
Why do we need it?
Because Joy is the fuel that sustains our success and performance over the long-term. Without it, we fizzle out or, worse, burn out.
Too many people make the mistake of saying they'll be happy "when" - when they get the next promotion, the next pay rise, achieve the next goal. This is the "Arrival Fallacy” - known as such because once they get that promotion, they still aren't happy, they'll now only be happy "when they get the next one”.
The reality is, most of our life is the journey and the moments we actually arrive at our destinations are fleeting. Tie our joy to some future finish line and we miss most of our life waiting for it. And the joy we expected on reaching it is never as strong or lasting as we hoped.
Joy also isn't just a nice-to-have once everything else is sorted, it's a performance enhancer in its own right. When we're happier, positive emotions flood the brain with dopamine and serotonin, sharpening our focus, improving our decision-making, increasing our creativity and resilience. When we're stressed or unhappy, our brain shifts into survival mode and our performance suffers.
It's a virtuous cycle: the happier we are, the better we perform, and the better we perform, the happier we become.
How do we get it?
We first need to stop telling ourselves we'll be happy "when," and stop assuming the answer is "more" - more achievement, more income, more recognition - because none of that closes the gap.
Instead, we make sure we're hitting all 3 macros. Engaging in activities each week that bring us enjoyment and protecting time for those. Working towards goals that truly matter to us, so we feel that sense of satisfaction from meaningful progress. Then we think about what would make our life feel purposeful - how we want to be remembered, what legacy we want to leave - and take small, deliberate steps in that direction.
3 questions to ask yourself:
Which of the 3 macronutrients am I most deficient in? What can I do to bring a little more of that macro into my life?
What am I curious about that I haven't given myself permission to explore?
Am I waiting to be happy "when"? If so, what could I do to enjoy the journey a little more?
